Advise me, with harshness. I fall into heedlessness often. I suffer from waswaas and it makes me fall into sins. For the most part, the only time in my life I feel truly happy is when seeking ilm. Yet I fall short and dont do enough. And I want to earn and get married. I have skills but I am lazy.

‎Stop waiting to feel ready. The Prophet ﷺ‎ said, be eager for what benefits you, seek Allah’s help and do not be helpless (Muslim), and Shaykh Ibn Uthaymin explained it as, do not be lazy, take the means. Seek refuge in Allah from laziness, turn away from the waswas completely and do not act on it, seek medical help for it, earn with the skills you have, and if you fear fitnah then marry.