I have anger/ hatred sometimes against the religion/ Allah by being discontent with the Decree if something doesn’t go my way. I blame Allah and might do disrespectful thing like stand on a picture of kaba or not doing a good deed to get revenge to Allah. Sometime I feel remorse sometime not.

Ustadh AbdulAziz al-Haqqan

You really need to go to a trustworthy Muslim Psychiatrist and manage these issues you have.